vacation

vacation

that's what i'm thinking about right now. very little else. i haven't enough of a vacation in a very long time. this probably sounds like a terrible claim to make, considering that i had a month break in between fall and spring semesters, one week of which i spent in london. and on that level, i grant any arguments and recognize up front that i am a greedy/selfish person when it comes to breaks. but i did spend a large part of my winter break grading papers, writing papers, filling out applications, and other tasks of that kind. so i didn't get much time to rest or do other things that i would like to do. and i don't foresee much chance of that sort of time in the near future. i have spring break coming up, and i'm quite excited for that, but i'm going to be writing my thesis (hopefully two chapters, but at least one). then i have the rest of the semester, and then i have summer. if i get the grant that i'm hoping for, i'll be doing summer research on a topic that i'm really excited about. if not, i'll be doing ecological research, and that's a good thing, but there's no chance that it can be as flexible as my work would be with the grant (in terms of working from anywhere, whenever i choose). but things will be good. i can be excited about either option. the third option is coaching soccer.

as a quick update on my phd program search, the rhetoric department had its prospective student day yesterday. there were some cool people that came in, and one in particular seems to be worrying about things much the same way as i am. so it was good to talk to her about graduate study and stuff. put simply, i learned this weekend that i would be happy getting my phd in the program i'm currently in. and i would be happy if she were to pursue graduate study here also. we'll see if either happens.

more than anything, i currently feel like i can handle most everything and feel mentally healthy (at least if things continue how they are right now). having someone in my life that i can talk to and share experiences with - that is giving me most everything that i need/want right now. i owe many people in my life a lot of credit/thanks, and i wish i could make them realize what they're meaning to me. i can't say much more than that right now, but if you think you're someone that has made an influence on my life, pause for a second and try think what that influence might be - maybe think of some particular memory that you share with me - then realize how much i appreciate our relationship - how sharing makes our lives better. i'm not going to write about any particular memory tonight because i'm going to trust you to think of one.

this is certainly one of those songs that i don't need to know what they're saying in order to like it (much like sigur ros). i do like that they are saying something, but i heard this song for the first time many months ago, and i could never remember it or even look it up because i couldn't remember the words or any other way to figure out what the song is. but i have liked it for quite a while.

anthems for a seventeen year old girl by broken social scene

used to be one of
the rotten ones
and i liked you for that
now you're all gone
got your makeup on
and you're not coming back

bleeching your teeth
smiling flash
talking trash under your breath
talking trash under my window

park that car
drop that phone
sleep on the floor
dream about me